Worst Episode Ever?

[andraste]

Glancing at the Outpost Gallifrey forums before bed, I noticed that someone had finally posted the combined results of the last round of cross-medium 'what's your favourite story?' voting. The answer is still Spare Parts, while The Talons of Weng-Chiang is the top story most people have actually heard of.

The bottom story, on the other hand, was the book version of The Ghosts of N-Space. While this is a legendarily bad story, I don't think I'd say it was the worst Doctor Who in all its occasionally glorious badness has to offer. Even given the Elvis impersonator. My nominations?

If I have to stick to TV stories, Time-Flight gets the wooden spoon. Pointless, annoying, boring tripe that looks like it was made for approximately $1.50.

My least favourite of all, though? The Unbound audio Exile, one of the few Doctor Who stories that personally offends me [1]. It's is disgustingly sexist without the excuse of having been made in the last century, but far worse, it's not funny. "The Doctor regenerates into a woman and promptly becomes an incompetent drunk" is probably the least good idea for a story in the history of anything ever. Offensive on every possible level, and made me think less of everyone involved.

So, what's your most hated Doctor Who?


[1] As opposed to the absolute legion that are offensive in the more general sense. To give you an idea how hard I am to offend, I am the card-carrying feminist who owns Sin City on DVD.

Comments

[jeriendhal.livejournal.com]

The entire Trial of a Time Lord season. Confusing, pointless, and with gaping continuity errors, along with the least charismatic Doctor ever (including William Hartnell at his grumpiest).

[andraste]

The entire Trial of a Time Lord season. Confusing, pointless, and with gaping continuity errors, along with the least charismatic Doctor ever (including William Hartnell at his grumpiest).

I adore the Sixth Doctor, but I certainly can't disagree with the point that Trial of a Time Lord was a horrible misfire. I'm always somewhat amazed that the series wasn't cancelled on the spot after The Ultimate Foe.

[saltedpin.livejournal.com]

If I have to stick to TV stories, Time-Flight gets the wooden spoon.
A story so full of suck that even Peter Davison couldn't keep a straight face.

I have to say, I thought 'Timelash' was pretty stupid when I last saw it. I don't know about worst ever, but it's the episode I have the worst memories of XD

[saltedpin.livejournal.com]

Also, as the writers of The Completely Useless Doctor Who Encyclopedia' pointed out, 'Timelash' is an anagram of 'Lame Shit'.

[danel4d.livejournal.com]

Timelash does have the advantage of being funny, though, even if its not intentional. And you can use it to help practice spotting general errors of all kinds.

[saltedpin.livejournal.com]

Ha! I love your icon!

And you can use it to help practice spotting general errors of all kinds.
True, true. Clearly, I have been interrogating it from the wrong perspective XD

[andraste]

I have to say, I thought 'Timelash' was pretty stupid when I last saw it. I don't know about worst ever, but it's the episode I have the worst memories of.

As others have pointed out, as least it's possible to laugh at Timelash or, as one alternative titles guide dubbed it, Doctor Who and the Anagram of Surprising Honesty. Time-Flight does not even have that going for it.

[saltedpin.livejournal.com]

That's true. Stupid and laughable is forgivable, stupid and boring and 'Oh God WHAT'-inducing really kind of isn't XD

[nwhyte]

What about "The Twin Dilemma"?

[andraste]

What about "The Twin Dilemma"?

It at least has the merit of being hilarious. Entirely unintentionally!

[doyle_sb4.livejournal.com]

Completely agreed about Exile. The female Doctor's suddenly incompetent, knows nothing about Earth (she's never heard of vodka or Princess Anne? What?) and even when it looks like she's finally getting back to being the Doctor... she loses. The Time Lords outsmart her. And there's no reason for her being the only portrayed-as-being-crap Doctor they've ever done other than "she's a gurl, lol"

[kerravonsen]

I'd only heard good reports of "Exile" before I listened to it, and I found it deeply, deeply dissappointing -- for all of the reasons you mention. But I didn't dare complain, or I'd be stomped on for "not having a sense of humour". Look, I don't find character assassination amusing. 8-(

[andraste]

But I didn't dare complain, or I'd be stomped on for "not having a sense of humour". Look, I don't find character assassination amusing. 8-(

Exactly! I'm all in favour of Doctor Who that is actually funny, but Exile is most assuredly not.

[andraste]

The female Doctor's suddenly incompetent, knows nothing about Earth (she's never heard of vodka or Princess Anne? What?) and even when it looks like she's finally getting back to being the Doctor... she loses. The Time Lords outsmart her.

I loathed the entire thing, but the ending left a really bad taste in my mouth. At least if she'd survived they could have partially redeemed themselves by doing a sequel in which she had a proper adventure. I think '... and then the Doctor loses irrevocably' would be a potentially interesting end for an AU story, but Exile is not that story.

And there's no reason for her being the only portrayed-as-being-crap Doctor they've ever done other than "she's a gurl, lol"

Precisely. Additionally offensive: her previous (male) incarnation constantly lecturing her about what a terrible Doctor she is.

[kerravonsen]

I think '... and then the Doctor loses irrevocably' would be a potentially interesting end for an AU story, but Exile is not that story.

No, "Full Fathom Five" is that story.

[andraste]

No, "Full Fathom Five" is that story.

True! It has David Collings into the bargain.

[londonkds.livejournal.com]

Of the stories I actually have on DVD, Timelash. Of stories I remember as being crud, The Twin Dilemma and Time and the Rani. Of New Who, The Christmas Invasion was painfully incompetent and deeply unpleasant in its characterisation and ideology.

[andraste]

Of stories I remember as being crud, The Twin Dilemma and Time and the Rani.

You remember correctly, although both can be entertaining in a 'hilarious trainwreck' kind of way if you're that way inclined. Much like Timelash, actually.

[redstarrobot.livejournal.com]

Caves of Androzani. It's tedious, highly derivative (and derivative of the already fairly lame and derivative "Phantom of the Opera", at that), and I've never managed to actually stay awake through the entire thing. Also, it features the whiniest companion ever, the stupidest "touching" self-sacrifice (DUDE, enough with the idiotic quest for bat milk; just spare us the pain of the coming season and let her die, all right? Seriously, does it make a difference plot-wise whether you unceremoniously give her to Caveman Brian Blessed or to the Phantom of the Quarry?), and it contains a sum total of 70 seconds of watchable senes; 30 of them are the secretary overthrowing the company, and the other 40 are all Colin Baker. And 70 seconds out of what feels like a goddamn thirty-two part story or something (I can't quite remember how many it is - I think I usually sleep through 12 or 13 of the episodes) is not much.

[andraste]

I love Caves to bits, and yet derive great pleasure from reading your rants about it. Possibly this makes me perverse *g*.

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

I usually say "The Sontaran Experiment," for which I have a deep and active hatred, but I'm not sure whether even I can defend it as being worse than "The Twin Dilemma." :)

[andraste]

I usually say "The Sontaran Experiment," for which I have a deep and active hatred, but I'm not sure whether even I can defend it as being worse than "The Twin Dilemma." :)

For me, The Twin Dilemma goes all the way through bad and comes out the other side *g*. At least it's funny, if only unintentionally so.

[st-aurafina.livejournal.com]

I hate, hate, hate Four to Doomsday. All that sitting around watching dancing when people are going to be killing them any time now? And Tegan, argh! Normally I'm fond of her, but in this one, she's getting her Aussie on so hard it makes my skin crawl.

[andraste]

I hate, hate, hate Four to Doomsday. All that sitting around watching dancing when people are going to be killing them any time now? And Tegan, argh! Normally I'm fond of her, but in this one, she's getting her Aussie on so hard it makes my skin crawl.

Quite. I am also eternally bemused that she just happens to speak exactly the same dialect as the Aboriginal elder who left Earth thousands of years before her. Which is not translated by the TARDIS, apparently. Um, WTF?

[kerravonsen]

I am also eternally bemused that she just happens to speak exactly the same dialect as the Aboriginal elder who left Earth thousands of years before her. Which is not translated by the TARDIS, apparently.

Yeah, that was the bit that really, really lost me with that episode. Actually, that particular point was made in the second verse of The Ballad of Tegan Jovanka.

[redfiona99.livejournal.com]

Not read many of the non-episode based books or heard any of the audios, so I'm a bit useless for that, but in terms of TV episodes - 'Tooth And Claw'. There have been more boring episodes, there have been episodes with far worse effects, there have been plots that were much more stupid, but no other episode causes me to want to put my fist through the face of our heroes.

[andraste]

There have been more boring episodes, there have been episodes with far worse effects, there have been plots that were much more stupid, but no other episode causes me to want to put my fist through the face of our heroes.

Yeah, I can understand that reaction. I wanted to punch them, too, although I actually enjoy the episode. Mostly because their jerktastic behaviour here has such heavey consequences later on. (Victoria is inspired to create Torchwood which leads to Doomsday which leads to Rose trapped in another universe and the Doctor being emo.)

[kerravonsen]

I simply can't bear to re-watch "Tooth and Claw". I may not want to put my fist through their faces, but I certainly want to slap some sense into both the Doctor and Rose.

[fangrrl-squees.livejournal.com]

(wandered over here via vilakins, btw)

For worst audio evar, I'd have to say "Creed of the Kromon" - although I've only heard about 25 minutes of it, because that was all I could take.

For TV... I think I'm with you on Time Flight or possibly that awful one with the licorice allsorts monster (the name of which, I've scoured from my memory)

I've only just started catching up with the books (that's my reading list for the next three years sorted...) but recently I was completely and utterly underwhelmed by Halflife, an EDA by Mark Michalowski (sp?)

[andraste]

For worst audio evar, I'd have to say "Creed of the Kromon" - although I've only heard about 25 minutes of it, because that was all I could take.

It is memorably awful, but I hate Minuet in Hell even more. Not even the Brig could save that one for me, I'm afraid.

For TV... I think I'm with you on Time Flight or possibly that awful one with the licorice allsorts monster (the name of which, I've scoured from my memory)

It's The Happiness Patrol, if you were morbidly curious *g*.

[fangrrl-squees.livejournal.com]

Oh dear god, I'd forgotten about Minuet in Hell. I think I made it five minutes into that and the awful accents had me on the verge of hurling my iPod across the room. *shudder*

[kerravonsen]

Oh? I don't remember "Minuet in Hell" being awful. But "Creed of the Kromon" was an endurance test, yes.

[andraste]

I think I made it five minutes into that and the awful accents had me on the verge of hurling my iPod across the room. *shudder*

It's a horrible audio all around, but the appalling accents are the last nail in the coffin.

[lizvogel.livejournal.com]

TV only, since I've not read/heard enough of the others to form a balanced opinion.

Old Who: It's a toss-up between The Web Planet (the concept's not bad, but if I never hear the ssssslowly talking bugssssss again....) and Frontier In Space, in which nothing happens for at least 3 of the 6 episodes.

(I recall really hating both Ghost Light and Curse of Fenric, but I haven't seen either in quite some time, so I'll give them the benefit of the doubt until the rewatching gets to that point.)

New Who: Love and Monsters, hands down. Just, um, no. Please, no.

[andraste]

It's a toss-up between The Web Planet (the concept's not bad, but if I never hear the ssssslowly talking bugssssss again....) and Frontier In Space, in which nothing happens for at least 3 of the 6 episodes.

I hate those! About Time offers this comment on The Web Planet:

"If everyone on Vortis acted as if this were their natural environment, and as if butterfly-people were a perfectly normal part of the terrain, then after an episode or so we might forget the weirdness of it and treat it as a place where interesting things might happen. Instead, we get showboating programme-makers constantly shouting 'look, this is alien!' at us. And we just want to shout 'no, it's stupid!' back at them."

[lizvogel.livejournal.com]

To give credit where it's due, they were at least trying to do real science fiction. I'll give them points for that. 10 out of 10 for effort, but minus several million for the insanely tedious execution of it all.