Get Martha Laid

[andraste]

After Human Nature/The Family of Blood and Blink, I have come to the conclusion that I do not 'ship Doctor/Martha even though they are often unbelievably cute. This is because Martha is too good for him. If he's not shagging her by now, the Doctor is clearly blind or stupid, probably both.

So Martha obviously needs to get her lovin' elsewhere. The trouble is, where from? For such a big universe, there are surprisingly few eligible bachelors I think she'd go for. There are plenty of wonderful women for her to shag if she were so inclined, but I've come to the conclusion that I am bad at femslash. (It is probably my being straight that is the problem there. Woe. If other people were to write Martha/Romana or something I would probably read it.) Also, there are loads of characters she could have fascinating gen/ampersand with - Leela and Martha Jones fight aliens! - but see the title of this post.



Ian Chesterton: joined at the hip to Barbara.

Steven Taylor: Sleeps with a stuffed panda, which might be a problem. (Although Martha Jones/Julian Bashir would be a CROSSOVER OF ULTIMATE WIN.)

Ben Jackson: Actually, I can sort of see this. Not as a longterm relationship, but Martha might appreciate a Cockney sailor as a temporary bit of rough.

Jaimie McCrimmon: Probably not sharp enough to be a good companion for her, but see Ben re: temporary bit of rough. Assuming he would cheat on Two.

Alastair Lethbridge-Stewart: ... no, I just can't see that at all.

John Benton: ... or this.

Mike Yates: Is gay.

Harry Sullivan: *falls over laughing*

Adric: Great Maker, no.

Vislor Turlough: I do not think Martha would go there, even if he is a ginger love god.

Chris Cwej: Search me, I've only read half a dozen NAs.

Hex Schofield: Ah, now this could be rather splendid if he could be lured away from Ace for a while.

Fitz Kreiner: I've only read half a dozen EDAs, too.

Kroton: Is Cyberman.

C'Rizz: Is possibly psychopathic lizardperson.

Mickey Smith: In another universe. Plus it would be hard not to make it seem like getting the two black characters together just because they are black.

Jack Harkness: Could be canon by next week for all we know. Hooray!

Owen Harper: A thousand times no.

Ianto Jones: Another one I would dearly like to see. Martha saves the world, Ianto makes the tea.

And in case you thought I was forgetting them ...

One: Um. No, can't see it. (And it's not because I have a problem seeing One in a romantic light, just ... not with Martha.)

Two: Now this has distinct possibilities. Probably what would actually happen is that Polly would end up commiserating with Martha because her Doctor wouldn't sleep with her, either.

Three: He would tell her to make the coffee and then she would hit him with a chair. (Ten only gets away with it because he is cute.)

Four: Would never cheat on Sarah Jane Romana Harry oh never mind.

Five: He would flail and stammer a lot. It would be ADORKABLE.

Six: Somehow, I don't think a meeting between these two would lead to romance. More like justifiable homicide on Martha's part - I just don't think she has the patience to appreciate his many charms.

Seven: The only Doctor I think actually is asexual.

Eight: I demand fanfic where Amnesiac!Eight gets together with Martha in 1969.

Nine: Like Ten, only with even more emo and even less shagging for Martha.

Hmmmm. I really think I was onto something with Martha/Julian Bashir though.

Comments

[marag.livejournal.com]

Martha/Ianto for the win! That would make me happy :) Well, as would Martha/Jack.

[andraste]

Martha/Ianto for the win! That would make me happy :)

Someone who is not me should so write this!

Well, as would Martha/Jack.

I think Martha/Jack/Ianto would also be the win.

[selenak.livejournal.com]

I like the idea of Martha/Julian Bashir! Next Multiverse? Also, you forgot Martha/Shakespeare, which is still an option since Ten has to visit Elizabethan England again. Unless she stands firm on her principles (that him being married and having bad breath thing...)

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

I heartily endorse this notion. Martha could just make sure to bring Tic Tacs next time she goes Elizabethan.

[andraste]

heartily endorse this notion. Martha could just make sure to bring Tic Tacs next time she goes Elizabethan.

I did wonder why no-one suggested that in the episode, but maybe Martha was just looking for an excuse *g*.

[andraste]

I like the idea of Martha/Julian Bashir! Next Multiverse?

Multiverse is good for so many things *g*.

Also, you forgot Martha/Shakespeare, which is still an option since Ten has to visit Elizabethan England again. Unless she stands firm on her principles (that him being married and having bad breath thing...)

If I started considering characters who only turn up in one episode, I'd have ended up with Martha/Charles Dickens *g*. Which, actually, is not the worst idea I've ever had ...

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

I totally vote for Martha/Jack, but the thought of Martha/Eight is unexpectedly lovely.

[andraste]

I totally vote for Martha/Jack, but the thought of Martha/Eight is unexpectedly lovely.

Naturally there should be Martha/Jack and Martha/Eight.

[violetisblue.livejournal.com]

Ooooh, Martha/amnesiac!Eight would be keen.

[andraste]

Ooooh, Martha/amnesiac!Eight would be keen.

It would be! Someone else will have to write that one, though, since I am years away from being that far through the EDAs.

[violetisblue.livejournal.com]

Same here--I've just barely scratched the surface.

[kerlin.livejournal.com]

(Although Martha Jones/Julian Bashir would be a CROSSOVER OF ULTIMATE WIN.)

I may have just gasped out loud. Wow. That would be...wow. Someone needs to write that.

Then the Doctor could face off against Kira and have chats with Dax about the whole multiple personalities thing and and...

[andraste]

I may have just gasped out loud. Wow. That would be...wow. Someone needs to write that.

If I can come up with a plot-substitute and refresh my memory with some shiny DVDs, I may just manage something.

Then the Doctor could face off against Kira and have chats with Dax about the whole multiple personalities thing and and...

The Doctor and Dax - any Dax- would be great fun together *g*.

[gwynevere1.livejournal.com]

Steven Taylor: Sleeps with a stuffed panda, which might be a problem.
OK - at first I though you meant Steve Taylor from Coupling, and I reasoned, "Hmm. Martha/Steven Moffat's self-insert? Makes sense."

[notfromvenus.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen Coupling - there's really a character named that? Moffat's such a geek! ;)

[gwynevere1.livejournal.com]

there's really a character named that?
Yup. And he's clearly Moffat's Gary Stu, too. A taller, better looking version of himself, with a girlfriend/wife named Susan and a baby son. ;) Steve even mentions how a sofa will protect you from Daleks.


Martha/Moffat. I'm just saying. :D

[andraste]

Martha/Moffat. I'm just saying. :D

Curse you for making me want a Coupling/Doctor Who crossover!

[gwynevere1.livejournal.com]

Sorry. If it helps, I can't get the image of Martha hitting Three with a chair out of my head -- and giggling at inappropriate times! :)

[st-aurafina.livejournal.com]

Martha/Ianto - it make so much sense. Martha is a very superhero type, and Ianto a born sidekick.

I can see Six/Martha - she wouldn't take any of his rubbish, she'd give him a good slap and then they'd get along okay.

[andraste]

Martha/Ianto - it make so much sense. Martha is a very superhero type, and Ianto a born sidekick.

I demand that someone write this immediately! Someone who is not me, that is. I will be over here writing Martha/Julian.

I can see Six/Martha - she wouldn't take any of his rubbish, she'd give him a good slap and then they'd get along okay.

It is true that the key to getting along with Six is refusing to put up with any BS from him.

[belleweather.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, I've got to put in a good word for Martha/Owen. Because Owen, being Owen, would be all over Martha like white on rice from the moment they met. And Martha, being completely and totally whipsmart would be able to both shag him and kick his ass -- as the better doctor, the better person, and the better lay. I LOVE this idea... so much so that I might, with sufficent prodding, liquor and bribes, be persuaded the write it even though I hate Owen with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns.

[andraste]

I LOVE this idea... so much so that I might, with sufficent prodding, liquor and bribes, be persuaded the write it even though I hate Owen with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns.

See, if it was written like that, I would love this hypothetical story! It was the idea of happy-happy fluffy Martha/Owen that I found off-putting.

The question is, how can you be bribed?

[amaresu]

Martha/Julian Bashir is a brilliant plan. I would read that.

Turlough can be surprisingly sweet. I think she'd like him. Until the first time they were ever in danger and then she'd hit him. Maybe still sleep with him after though?

Ace/Hex/Martha would be pure gold though.

C'Rizz: Is possibly psychopathic lizardperson

You say this like it's a bad thing. And he hides the psychopathic part really well. I bet he wouldn't mind having Martha in his head at all.

I have a strange love for Owen, perhaps it's just creepy characters, and thing he would charm her for a bit.

Amnesiac!Eight is far too possible. Eight just had memory problems.

In conclusion Martha/Julian Bashir needs to be written and by many people. It can be the strange and bizarre crossover pairing fad of Doctor Who, like Ianto/Peter (Heroes) only make sense.

[andraste]

Martha/Julian Bashir is a brilliant plan. I would read that.

It's a surprisingly popular idea!

Turlough can be surprisingly sweet. I think she'd like him. Until the first time they were ever in danger and then she'd hit him. Maybe still sleep with him after though?

Being a Turlough fan, I certainly can't argue with your logic there *g*. I guess it would depend on how they met each other and her first impressions of him.

Ace/Hex/Martha would be pure gold though.

Ace/Hex/Martha for the win!

You say this like it's a bad thing. And he hides the psychopathic part really well. I bet he wouldn't mind having Martha in his head at all.

See, this is where the problem lies *g*.

I have a strange love for Owen, perhaps it's just creepy characters, and thing he would charm her for a bit.

You know, after a couple of comments, I think I would now quite like to see Owen/Martha. Not in a happy-happy way, but it would certainly be an interesting pairing.

Amnesiac!Eight is far too possible. Eight just had memory problems.

His recurring amnesia has long reached legendary status. As has his sluttiness, of course, which makes the Eight/Martha even easier.

In conclusion Martha/Julian Bashir needs to be written and by many people. It can be the strange and bizarre crossover pairing fad of Doctor Who, like Ianto/Peter (Heroes) only make sense.

This certainly gets my seal of approval. Maybe I should go buy some DS9 DVDs and refresh my memory.

[notfromvenus.livejournal.com]

(from who_daily:)

Martha/Jack FTW! (But I also ship Rose/Jack, because srsly, that scene on top the Chula ship?)

If he's not shagging her by now, the Doctor is clearly blind or stupid, probably both.>

Or into musical theater. ;)

Probably what would actually happen is that Polly would end up commiserating with Martha because her Doctor wouldn't sleep with her, either.

And then they would decide "to hell with him" and have Hawt Lesbian Sex.

[andraste]

Martha/Jack FTW! (But I also ship Rose/Jack, because srsly, that scene on top the Chula ship?)

Since I ship Jack/The Known Universe, I understand completely *g*.

Or into musical theater. ;)

Given his history with Reinette (and Rose/Sarah Jane/Joan/etc. depending on how you see those relationships) I think he probably does like girls. Not that this will stop me 'shipping Ten/Jack and probably Ten/Saxon.

And then they would decide "to hell with him" and have Hawt Lesbian Sex.

I would heartily approve of this concept! And Polly is in 1969, so it would be easy to have them meet - for all we know, Martha was sleeping on her couch while they were stuck there.

[notfromvenus.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I"m sure the Doctor does like girls, actually (and you forgot Romana!). But not necessarily only girls (the Master is SO his creepy stalker ex ;)).

And yanno.... I actually saw a Polly/Rose PWP fic out there recently. I love Who fandom - anything and anyone is fair game. ;)

[sunnytyler001.livejournal.com]

Yeahh!!! Martha/Jack!!!!

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Three: He would tell her to make the coffee and then she would hit him with a chair.

So. True. I am chortling at the delightful mental image.

[andraste]

I am chortling at the delightful mental image.

If I could draw, there would be fanart *g*.

[tricksterquinn.livejournal.com]

MARTHA/JULIAN BASHIR. That makes my whole world happy.

Also, people must have written Ianto/Martha and Ianto/Martha/Jack, but I haven't found it yet. This is tragic.

And your breakdown here is MAGIC.

I completely and utterly agree re: Ten/Martha. I would be all over her - there's something wrong with him (though I think he may in fact be aware of this fact).

[zonya35.livejournal.com]

Martha Jones/Julian Bashir YAY!! I'll love to read that.