More Ideal Jobs
Apr. 9th, 2007 11:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I swear, I will never get bored of this bit of script! Every time I think I have seen everything that's programmed into it, it throws another one at me. Career guidance from the magic computer thingy:
- the coalition of the willing -
George W. Bush: Vibrator tester
Tony Blair: Professional Tramp
John Howard: Lap dancer
... I cannot help thinking they would do less damage this way.
- actors! -
Ian McKellen: Monkey Impressionist
Patrick Stewart: Prime Minister (I think we should campaign for this.)
apathocles wanted Transfomers, and who am I to refuse her?
- Autobots, who mostly weren't that funny so I didn't bother listing most of them -
Wheeljack: Pirate
Ratchett: Pro Football Player
Skyfire: Gigolo (the real reason he and Starscream broke up)
- Decepticons, who are much, much funnier -
Galvatron: President
Cyclonus: Stand Up Comedian
Thundercracker: Church Minister
Skywarp: Topless Model
Soundwave: Suicide Bomber
Rumble: Ho
- and saving the best for last -
Unicron: Pole Dancer (... all I can think is 'gosh, that would have be a very big pole!')
Megatron: Village Idiot
Starscream: Garden Gnome
Optimus Prime: Nun (this is my favourite thing ever)
- Peace Keepers, because Apathy's wish is my command -
Aeryn Sun: Porn Star
Scorpius: Dodgem Driver
Mele-On Grazay: Panto Dame
Bialar Crais: Soap Actor
Braca: Anything except what you're doing now (yeah, I cans see him feeling that way for much of the series.)
- characters selected at random for their hilarity -
G'Kar: Nice Old Man
Londo Mollari: Porn Star (... only when I'm writing the story)
Winn Adami: Wicked Witch of the West
Garak: Mime Artist
Captain Picard: Muppet Impersonator
Batman: Kids TV Presenter
Avon: Nursury Teacher
Vila Restal: Shoplifting
Rorschach: stripper (*screams some more*)
- the coalition of the willing -
George W. Bush: Vibrator tester
Tony Blair: Professional Tramp
John Howard: Lap dancer
... I cannot help thinking they would do less damage this way.
- actors! -
Ian McKellen: Monkey Impressionist
Patrick Stewart: Prime Minister (I think we should campaign for this.)
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- Autobots, who mostly weren't that funny so I didn't bother listing most of them -
Wheeljack: Pirate
Ratchett: Pro Football Player
Skyfire: Gigolo (the real reason he and Starscream broke up)
- Decepticons, who are much, much funnier -
Galvatron: President
Cyclonus: Stand Up Comedian
Thundercracker: Church Minister
Skywarp: Topless Model
Soundwave: Suicide Bomber
Rumble: Ho
- and saving the best for last -
Unicron: Pole Dancer (... all I can think is 'gosh, that would have be a very big pole!')
Megatron: Village Idiot
Starscream: Garden Gnome
Optimus Prime: Nun (this is my favourite thing ever)
- Peace Keepers, because Apathy's wish is my command -
Aeryn Sun: Porn Star
Scorpius: Dodgem Driver
Mele-On Grazay: Panto Dame
Bialar Crais: Soap Actor
Braca: Anything except what you're doing now (yeah, I cans see him feeling that way for much of the series.)
- characters selected at random for their hilarity -
G'Kar: Nice Old Man
Londo Mollari: Porn Star (... only when I'm writing the story)
Winn Adami: Wicked Witch of the West
Garak: Mime Artist
Captain Picard: Muppet Impersonator
Batman: Kids TV Presenter
Avon: Nursury Teacher
Vila Restal: Shoplifting
Rorschach: stripper (*screams some more*)