Best Toy Ever!

[andraste]

One of my co-workers sent me a bit of script where you put your name in and the computer tells you your ideal job. I have concluded that it doesn't like me, as it took several variations on my name before it gave me the cool job of Top Gun Pilot. After being told off for inspiring hysterics in the guy sitting next to me (it said one of our colleagues should be a circus freak - if you know him, you'd have hysterics too) I took to entering the names of fictional characters. It gave me things like this:

Charles Xavier: Cowboy
Magneto: Porn star

Then, because I am obsessed and have nothing better to do, I went through the entire list of Doctor Who companions. Sometimes I had to enter names a few different ways to avoid duplicates.



Your ideal job would be ...

Susan Foreman: ... between one and six on days with a W in them.
Ian Chesterton: Cowboy
Barbara Wright: In a land far, far away.
Vicki: Reality TV show star.
Steven: Animal therapist
Katarina: Permanant Temp (kind of an apt description, really)
Sara Kingdom: Housekeeper
Dodo Chaplet: Lumberjack (*sporfle*)
Benjamin Jackson: Rear end of a panto cow
Polly Wright: Kid's TV presenter
James Robert McCrimmon: Playing for Aberdeen (the scary thing is, in some universe he probably is!)
Victoria Waterfield: Retail store manager
Zoe Heriot: Professional shopper
Liz Shaw: anything except what you're doing now (obviously why she left UNIT)
Brigadier Alastair Lethbridge-Stewart: ... who are you kidding, you work?
Captain Michael Yates: Air Stewardess
John Benton: Professional Hippy
Jo Grant: Stripper (insert lewd remark about Daleks here)
Sarah Jane: Goal Scoring Superstar Hero (she is!)
Harry Sullivan: Unemployed
Leela: Vibrator tester (... words fail me)
K9: Insurance fraudster
Romana I: Ho
Romana II: Porn Star (at this point, I nearly got myself in trouble for laughing too loudly again)
Adric: Big Game Hunter
Nyssa of Traken: Circus freak
Tegan Jovanka: Dodgem Driver
Turlough: Emperor of all the World (in a reality where he took the Black Guardian up on his offer?)
Peri Brown: Teaching pensioners to drive
Erimemushimteperem: Human Shield
Frobisher: Topless Model
Evelyn Smythe: Prime Minister (I would so vote for her!)
Melanie Bush: Professional Tramp
Dorothy 'Ace' McShane: Pole dancer
Thomas Hector Schofield: Lap dancer (... this is some bizarre AU where the Seventh Doctor owns a strip joint, I see.)
Grace Holloway: Movie star
Charlotte Pollard: Chef
C'Rizz: Rally Car Driver
Rose Tyler: Alien investigator (behold, the only person on the whole list actually doing the right job!)
Mickey Smith: The job you have now (... except Mickey. See, Doomsday really is a happy ending.)
Jack: God (they said it, not me)
Donna Noble: Jungle explorer
Martha Jones: Funeral Director (she hasn't lost that many patients!)

- also, Torchwood -

Gwen Cooper: Brain surgeon
Owen Harper: Heavyweight Boxer (with Weavils?)
Tosh Sato: Shoplifting
Ianto Jones: Office numpty

- assorted villains -

The Master: hypnotist (now the computer is scaring me.)
Davros: Stripper (*screams and runs away*)
The Rani: Fluffy Bunny Trainer
The Emperor of the Daleks: Stand Up Comedian
The Cybercontroller: Psycho-Therapist
Zagreus: Traffic Warden
Mr. Saxon: Soap Actor

- and of course we can't leave the Doctor out -

The Doctor: Sewage Worker (oh dear. The real reason he left Gallifrey?)
The First Doctor: Puppeteer (I can so see this!)
The Second Doctor: Bearded Lady in the circus (*falls over giggling*)
The Third Doctor: Clown (... no, I think you'll find that was the last one.)
The Fourth Doctor: Palaeontologist
The Fifth Doctor: Panto Dame
The Sixth Doctor: Superhero (well, of course!)
The Seventh Doctor: Quizz Show Contestant (he'd certainly win a lot)
The Eighth Doctor: Spinster with cats
The Ninth Doctor: Ho (... no comment)
The Tenth Doctor: Pirate (yays!)



I make my own fun. If anyone is as bored as I am, feel free to put forward your own name or that of your favourite character.

Comments

[kattahj.livejournal.com]

Bearded Lady in the circus

I can actually see Two doing this...

[andraste]

I can actually see Two doing this...

Me, too. He's one of the Doctors who engages in canon cross-dressing, although the BBC sadly set fire to it.

[kattahj.livejournal.com]

That was what I was thinking of, yeah. :-)